Do what makes you happy. Part 4

 Are you depriving yourself? 

What are you depriving yourself of? Do you crave chocolates? A vacation? A long walk or drive? Simple, small things that may possibly be dismissed by your partner? A board game or a trip to the cottage?  

Maybe your life goals no longer match with your partner’s? Maybe you are stuck in a loveless relationship because you are afraid? Afraid that you will be alone so you would rather stay unhappy than take a step and find happiness? Do not deprive yourself of having bacon and eggs if your significant other is a vegetarian. If you have constant fights about it… Rethink your relationship. You may not want 40-50 years of that. Or give in after 10 years of marriage when you know this is an issue. Goes back to personal happiness and joy and not compromises that you are unable to manage. 

Your life is about you. 

Your life is in your hands. It is not in the hands of your family, friends or your partners. If your partner does not agree then you need to do things on your own or find a new partner. You are not being selfish for doing things you want to do. Your life is your life. No one should control you or tell you what to do. 

That being said, a healthy relationship is about caring, compromising and communicating. If… and that is a big IF. If you love your partner then compromise and being together are not looked upon as a form of giving in and giving up personal happiness.  

Who is unreasonable?  

Do not give in to unreasonable expectations. Do not make promises that you know full well you will only be able to keep for the short term. If you turn to be a vegetarian to make your partner happy and resent them for your decision… It’s best to move on. Find a burger-loving bacon addict like yourself or a full on plant loving soul to live with.  

There is nothing wrong with being you. Be the you, you want to be! 

Why give in to unreasonable expectations even for the short term. If you know deep inside something is not right, or something feels off. Rip off the band-aid quickly and do not wait.  

What is the point of waiting? 

Waiting is procrastinating over the inevitable. Waiting will only cause anxiety, fear and pain. While carrying around a monkey on your back for the sake of dealing with the inevitable.  

If you need to clear the deck so to speak it is best to clear it sooner than later. Do it before you sink under the pressure you are putting yourself under.  

There is nothing wrong with saying no. There is nothing wrong with giving up something negative in your life. If it brings you pain and you are unhappy it is time to move on. 

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Published by Zsolt Zsemba

Zsolt Zsemba has worn many different hats. He has been an entrepreneur, and businessman for over 30 years. Living abroad has given him many amazing experiences in life and also sparked his imagination for writing. After moving to Canada from Hungary at the age of 10 and working in a family business for a large part of his life. The switch from manufacturing to writing came surprisingly easily for him. His passion for writing began at age 12, mostly writing poetry and short stories. In 1999, the chance came to write scripts. Zsolt took some time off from his family business to write in Jakarta Indonesia for MD Entertainment. Having written dozens of soap operas and made for TV movies, in 2003 Zsolt returned to the family business once more. In 2018, he had the chance to head back to Asia once again. He took on the challenge to be the COO for MD Pictures and get back into the entertainment business. The entertainment business opened up the desire to write once more and the words began to flow onto the pages again. He decided to rewrite a book he began years ago. Organ House was reborn and is a fiction suspense novel while Scars is a young adult drama focused on life’s challenges. After the first two books, his desire to write not only became more challenging but enjoyable as well. After having several books completed he was convinced to publish them for your enjoyment. Zsolt does not tend to stay in one specific genre but tends to lean towards strong female leads and horror. Though he also has a few human interest books, he tends to write about whatever brews in his brain for a while.

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